Confessions of a Wino

Anyone got an update on Diego Maradona?  Regular readers know that I hate the Argies with a passion normally reserved for mindless football thugs.  However, when it comes to wine I try to make allowances, and it just so happens that my thuggery dissipates faster than the bubbles in a bottle of cava, once an open bottle of Argentinean wine is placed on the table.

I love the Faldeos Nevados Malbec, so I really should have tried the Bonarda from the same producer earlier than this.  Bonarda, is not, although it sounds so, the name of an Italian porn star, but an indigenous grape of the cheating football nation.  Albeit not the cheating football nation that brought you the Mano de Dios, it originated in Italy!  Enough of the football insults, what was the wine like?

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Perennial problem isn’t it?  Matching wine and food.  Which wino has never deliberated over what to serve with foie gras (easy one – Chateau d’Yquem), or mature Argentinean Steak (I would do a Malbec)?  But what about the really tough dishes like chocolate desserts, for example.  What if your dinner party plan includes serving beans on toast?

These thoughts swirled around my head like a pair of boxer shorts in a launderette as I drove back to the flat for my evening repast, which happened to be, due to forgetting to stop at the shops, beans on toast.

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Now, I could bore you with the old story about Dick van Dyke’s ropey cockney accent, but I am going to spare you that.  Instead, I am going to bore you about the third English wine I have sampled this year, Limney Horsmonden 2006.

Well the first thing to say is that they are not going to win any prizes for label design.

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The Olympic Games are coming to London in 2012.  Like most Olympic preparations there are rumours of delays, accusations of bribery and corruption, confirmation of massive cost increases, and public doubts that anything will be ready on time.

This is all entirely normal in the run up to any Olympics.  However, unlike other recent hosts, we have contrived to produce the most astonishingly inept logo, and at £400,000, it looks about as cheap as a Northern Rock mortgage.

Rapsani from Tsantali Winery claims to be “The wine of the Gods of Olympos” but I take this with a pinch of salt since, elsewhere on the bottle the label breaks out into a nasty bout of francophilia, claiming the wine to be “Appellation d’Origine de Qualité Supérieure”.

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I was once served Salice Salentino at the Flying Pizza “from zee heel of Italy’s boot, signor”.  I loved it, and later discovered the heel was, in fact, Puglia.  Since then I have looked out for wines from the area and spotted Pillastro Primitivo 2002 at STWC for less than a tenner.  Robert Parker awarded this wine 88 points apparently.  I don’t award points as (a) I am no expert; (b) wine is too subjective and personal; and (c) I can’t be arsed.

This Pillastro at 13.5% was full bodied and displayed red cherries, nutmeg and some leather.  Quite a serious wine for only slightly more than the cost of a Blair family holiday.  Drinking this wine is a bit like eating a rich fruitcake but I’ve already made one reference to Tony Blair so perhaps I’ll quit while I’m ahead.

I’ve been a bit healthier than usual recently.  Walking up mountains in Switzerland; exercising on my cross trainer at home; eating lots of fresh fruit; cutting down on fried food; and even eating Bran Flakes.

I used to think that Bran Flakes were disgusting but, like a lot of things in life, you grow into them as you get older.  Olives, oysters, snails, mustard and Armagnac were all off my list until at least my thirties but now I love them, (not sure I will ever pick up a taste for anchovies though).

You may recall the last time I tried a Zinfandel, it was awful.

So I wonder if Zin is one of the things I will grow into after a number of tastings?

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Although not of the Catholic faith, I feel the need to confess.  To you.  I have sinned.  I am guilty as charged.  What is my heinous crime so dark and mysterious?  I am a beginner.  No, really! At everything?  Truly, everything!

Maybe it’s an age thing.  I love my job and pretend that I know lots about enterprise software but the truth is that every year that passes I double my knowledge on that subject.  At that rate of acceleration, it makes me realise how little I actually know.  For example, if my knowledge keeps doubling every year, then in ten years time I will know 1024 times more than I know right now.  That proves that I know virtually nothing.  And so it is with wine, my other “specialist” subject.

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I wanted Bresse Bleu but I just can’t find it in the UK, so I settled for second best, Cambozola, which is a German Cheese available at any supermarket.

For me, eating a German Blue “Brie” is just plain wrong.  It must be like eating a Dr Oetkers Pizza (you really are having a laugh – An Italian product, made in Germany and sold in England – ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha).  I’ve never tried it but surely nobody buys that marketing line?  Have you seen the TV ad?  A loving couple on a first date sat on a suspension bridge in the open air at a fully set table, eating a pizza made in Germany, approximately 1.3 miles from the nearest oven.  I haven’t laughed so much since I found www.hugeurl.com – waging the war against brevity.

But sometimes we can’t always get what we want, so we have to settle for second best.  In my case I can’t afford a decent Barolo so I sampled a bottle of Langhe Nebbiolo de Forville Barbaresco 2005 as my second best.  After tasting the wine I guessed it was from a supermarket at about £4.99.  In fact, online, I found this wine at Majestic at a whopping £7.99.

 

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“Original all American wine!”.  “Pride of California!”.  “Bold and not for the faint hearted…”.  “What are you doing lurking around my website?”

Encouraged by various American correspondents, I promised to try a Californian Zinfandel.  I had only stopped at Sainsbury’s Supermarket for 568ml of milk (remember pints?) but where there’s a wine stand, there’s a wino.

Apart from the ubiquitous Gallo, the only “Zin” I could find was Ravenswood Lodi 2004 Old Vines Zinfandel.  At £8.49 it is one of the most expensive wines at this supermarket but I figured it had to be worth the extra.

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Well the English football season is back and what better way to celebrate Man City’s stunning victory over West Ham, than with an English wine review? 

This wine was made from a grape variety about as well known as most of the Man City first team.  For those not in England, Sven-Göran Eriksson has been on a buying spree across the globe bringing in players from Bulgaria, Brazil, Italy, Spain, Switzerland, and Bosnia & Herzegovina.  Names like Elano, Bianchi, Geovanni, Garrido, Fernandes, and Schonburger.  Oh no, hang on, that last one was the name of the grape used to make this Three Choirs Stone Brook 2005.

 

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