Confessions of a Wino

Day seven of my lamentable detox effort.  No alcohol has cursed my veins, but the no-caffeine promise has been all too frequently punctured by warm, friendly, lovable mugs of Earl Grey.

Having been snowed in most of the week, tonight I am waiting for the F Word final on Channel 4.  It’s a shame that Manchester’s Sweet Mandarin was eliminated in the semi.  Further shame that Evuna didn’t make it through the heats, if only for its super wine list.  Good luck to The Pheasant - looks favourite to win.

Appearing on the F Word, I hear, are fellow bloggers Oliver Thring and Helen Graves, and Douglas Blyde.  All good reads.  Will they be dancing a Gay Gordon?

An attempt to impress the mother in law almost ended in failure.  Having tried to book places under the direction of Marco Pierre White and Richard Corrigan (and others) only to be told there was no room at the inn, we were suspicious that the Westbury could easily accommodate us at 8pm on a Saturday evening.  We shouldn’t have worried.  Wilde has the atmosphere of a posh but modern grill with the service of a well dressed regiment of polite bombardiers from nations far and wide and including an occasional Irish accent.  The food is as good as I’ve eaten in Dublin and, yes, I have tried Eddie Rocket’s.

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With superstars like Robert de Niro sponsoring Tribeca as an upcoming area (and selflessly trousering a good portion of the profits of Tribeca Grill), despite the proliferation of convenient subway stops, there was only one way to arrive.  I asked our Taxi Driver why he was tanking down these Mean Streets like a Raging Bull.  He said that given the Heat, and whilst he was not the King of Comedy, he was a Goodfella and, put simply, The Mission was to Meet the Parents, and not least, The Godfather (Part II) before the Midnight Run.  Before I had time to Analyze This, it was Showtime – the waitresses were Flawless and it was time to Meet the Fockers.

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This is just the sort of place I imagined an upmarket New York restaurant would look like.  Solid, spacious, salubrious and snobby, and that is a compliment.  It is expensive in the evening but if, like me, you are on a budget, there are some great deals at lunchtime.  I visited in September 2009 and unlike former customer, Monica Lewinsky, I managed to keep my stains on the tablecloth.

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If you eat out in the UK you might be interested in a new website aimed right atcha… Here is the press release:

An online portal, which brings people with a passion for food together to share their dining out experiences, has been launched. iStarvin, a site that combines the convenience of a restaurant directory with in-depth content and eye-catching photos, connects individuals with an interest in food and dining, allowing them to follow each other’s activity or seek recommendations for a special occasion.

Unlike the launch of many of their competitors, iStarvin has already done an adept job of creating a highly comprehensive restaurant directory.  There are few, if any reviews yet, and there are one or two website glitches, but it looks like a great start.  Clearly they hope to create a community to contribute insights and recommendations, but the business model relies on restaurateurs taking the opportunity to embellish the offer (for a price) and include, for example, the facility to book tables online.  Like any advertising model this depends on Muggles like me and you using the service.

Being a mobile kind of guy, I rarely search a website unless it is apped up.  I am getting increasingly dissatisfied with Urbanspoon, Opentable, and AroundMe, so I hope that when iStarvin launches the iPhone app, it will be a truffle amongst mushrooms.

This is a well worn business model with no clear leader so I admire iStarvin’s balls in entering the market.  Having said that, they have learnt from their competitors’ mistakes and it looks to be the best attempt yet from a consumer perspective (and that is the critical success factor).

iStarvin is using social media well to publicise the new site.  I learned of it on Twitter from the excellently erudite Oliver Thring, one of the many food bloggers I met at EWBC.  If you are a foodie, you should also follow Niamh, Chris, Lizzie and Douglas, charming chaps and chappesses all.

An open top “Tommy the tourist” bus in New York is indisputably the best place to learn about New York culture.  Well, if you believe the tour guides (and assuming that you tip them enough).  I learnt that if you want to eat cheaply in NYC there are two options:  McDonalds, or Restaurant Row on W46th St between 8th and 9th.

Bangkok House is not McDonalds, but it certainly isn’t expensive either.

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Is there anything that could make me feel more at home on my first night in New York, than an old fashioned English Victorian style chop house that has been around since 1885.  However, comparing this to, say, Sam’s Chop House, is a bit like putting The Oxo Tower up against the Empire State Building.

They are both fine examples of art deco architecture but one is dainty and proportioned, whilst the other is just f##king massive.  I am not sure I have seen a restaurant with so many rooms, so many more covers  than the ESB has floors (there are 102 since you ask and 1860 steps if you walk up – I didn’t).  Keen’s is enormous.  And they serve meat portions to match.

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Needing more of a brunch than a breakfast, we pulled in for a typical NY Italian, and I was pleased to see Eggs Benedict on the menu.  But it’s not exactly what you get in The Wolseley.  Firstly, New Yorkers need three poached eggs. Then replace the bacon with prosciutto and add fried potatoes and chillies, and enough pepper to bring dusk forwards by an hour and ten minutes.  Not going to win me the Fat Fighters Slimmer of the Year prize, but should keep me filled up until dinner time.

Right.  Where are those 1860 steps up the Empire State?  I need exercise.

Grotta Azzurra, 177 Mulberry Street aka 387 Broome Street, Little Italy, New York 10013.
T: +1 212 925 8775
W: www.bluegrotta.com

Browsing through the comprehensive wine list, I was delighted, and more than a little relieved, to find a section marked Under $75, full of interesting wines.  What is this New York obsession with pricing wine like its skyscraper condos – way out of the reach of the average man?

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Borgata is the newest and smartest casino in AC and way out of the reach of my meagre finances, so, naturally, I dashed there to see if I could find some decent tiffin. No such thing as cheap. Even the taxi from Caesar’s (tacky) Palace was $15 for a mere 3 minute dash across town.

Tucked away in a wee cranny of this Cathedral to St Cajetan is a restaurant that sounds like an ice hockey match being played to Eine Kleine Nachtmusik.  It is one of about a dozen eating places in the casino, ranging in quality from Jack High to Four of a Kind.  We chose this one hoping for something better than soggy chips but cheaper than a Royal Flush. 

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